i will redeem myself

i'm looking into the sun, and these two days will leave my face brown and smiling week ends are the only endings i like a soul splinter of jesus meanders past traffic to school walking and waving, everyone's greeting behind his teeth grocery bag full of food and a upturned thumb goodwill and goodfortune everyman's boy, every mom's favourite, goldenchild, every peer's best friend and he's all ours we should know our luck he knows everyone's name 56 days

spending all your nights growing old in your bed

oh creepy yoga pants man crank your engine and be jealous of youth and nothing wasting life. averting the future. I wish the power would stay out forever, so we could stay here singing at the top of our lungs. remember us (?) 57 days left

Rain down your waiting world

Light filters through opaque cloud blankets, reflected in the rear view mirror tree's vivid green, street line's yellow, and black tarmac pop, saturated up to my irises At one point in time a pot farm on the pottery teacher's property would have shocked me. My mother is disgusted, other teachers angry, and I'm oddly detached. It's no big deal, he just got caught, he wasn't hurting anybody, and when will he come back. but it came out of nowhere, and it shakes. I want to die dreaming, but I have no dreams. My organs must be rotting. You're like a paper-shredder to my patience. 63 days

and open your arms to the swarm.

Kaleidoscope . too much wind, and light, and thought to process Is this what you aim to feel like? always waiting, chest cavity soul, heart aching, breaking numb intensly sensitive to the ambit I'm going out of my head, paused and left to idle. Oh won't you be surprised I'm running on empty, and don't want you over tonight. 64 days

come now what's your name again

Over the past 76 hours or so I've heard the phrase "none of this matters in the real world" put on repeat. Sadly, I still don't know what "this" won't matter, because they were all referring to something different when they said it. Four hours to go. I'm 294 words in to a 1000 word paper on the Weimar Government and someone's eaten all of the sourcream pringles. The worlds is ending a little bit, and I spend too much time watching my nails grow, trying not to listen. I've come to the conclusion that I'm a complexly simple person. 68 days to go.

hold me down, sweet and low, little girl

It's so clear. wind whipping past, eyes watering, preset in a row. what should happen happens. banter over bread and butter frustrations and show giggles lead singer and backup she smiles, her eyes flash, and he falters like we all knew he would. clarity doesn't fix anything, super(villain)hero* and sidekick. * (same thing? is a hero a hero if they have only one redeeming quality? a heart encased in kryptonite?) 69 days left. purify