I'm so tired of dreaming without falling asleep.

success. it's so much easier without you there. Every once in a while I'll have the most bizarre dreams. Dreams I should wake up exhausted from, in which I can feel tangibly, experience things I've never done in reality, and wake up in the morning remembering only the adrenaline filled details. I swear it, once I felt teeth under my tounge, cheeks under my hands, fingers behind my neck; I couldn't look at them the same for weeks after I came to, not quite trusting that it was dream instead of a devious joke involving heavy cold meds and cruel intentions. I had another last night, probably the third I remember. It was all imagination, I'd never met those involved before, but I could feel vividly. I should have bruised wrists and raw lips, the car door was cold red and the interior was cheap older carpet under an open top. The backdrop and buildings weren't recognizeable, but my plams still remember how it felt. I wake up still expecting to be there. 88 days.